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"There," I said, " that's how a robot would feel happiness." and render the gif as the deer walks by outside the window
For one more month I'm living on an island.
You can wrangle what you can out of that time via the arts, but it's not a question of compensation it's a question of expression.
So revisit 3d fractal rendering software again, coming back up against barely understood math and a broken computer with no screen that just flashes at you in monochrome with dark teal and low magenta banding depending on what you are looking at.
'happiness.gif' not for sale, a collection of math rendered in software in spring of 2021, based on the observation for a separate project that robots would require means to express their emotions, and a fantastic tool would be the opportunity to render quick animations of mathematical landscapes as emotional responses, making use of a universal vocabulary of values.
the deer that walked by the window is the second child of the deer that has a human name and it is apple.
I tried feeding apple some apple ONE single time.
Because people aren't supposed to feed the deer.
Mow the lawn to make sure the mushrooms don't grow and the flowers don't come back and the grass can be sustained.
Don't feed the deer.
People hate the deer.
I guess that's how it goes.
The resultant work was nothing that could be sold , just mockups for projects that could be done.
One of the most common blender tutorials has you making a donut. People make some amazing donuts.
But it's all speculative, just like all the other art made but not intended for sale in any way.
'donut.gif, another not for sale gif used to express the feeling that despite the feeling that the roads might not be connected right now, that the ebb and flow of things encourages optimism.
Dipping into Photogrammetry while the death count rises.
Focusing on VFX when unemployment suddenly stops.
Learning that at another house. a dead baby deer showed up on the side of the house, apparently starved.
'reaction.gif'
I think there's something very fun about these images, I'm glad I made them.
The arena of recognition of shock fades away with the footage of state sanctioned murder caught on video being put on trial, and the face of a murdered kid is broken in half, and people say the wrong things and transgressive values are mistaken for the birth of a nation.
The downtown business burea releases a legislative path forward titled: 'build 2 thousand houses this year, put people in them, then make being homeless in public illegal'.
"Get those things out of our child's favorite park!!!"
That grass that we keep the deer off of we keep the homeless off of too.
The deer let it be known that they don't think of themselves as unhoused, but rather of us as trapped.
The unhoused are navigating their way out of this broken situation too, show some kindness and respect.
People who know better about these things, who have navigated much harder circumstances but also done it with much greater burdens and much greater spans of disadvantageous terrain advise: Don't worry about it, follow your passion and you'll love your life.
There's got to be more to it then that.
I've seen commercials before movies, I've walked along small paths in the dark of the forest.
There's a sizeable number of us that have got to talking about how it all seems to be breaking down around us. Nevermind how hard it is to notice when something is changing.
It's a good time to not aspire to be the oppressor.
My city has had a 5 year plus 'homeless emergency'. I grew up there. I visited the downtown as a kid, decades ago. I wondered about what it would be like to be an artist and run a cafe bar. I wondered about the bowling alleys being gone. I wondered about all the parks becoming too crowded.
Needle park is also called noodle park is where the original skid road is. And for as long as it's been a city that got taken from people, there's been displaced people in that park. It's a young city, I think 160 years old?
I can't make it work there anymore, I don't know what it's like to look at the city and feel a sense of wonder, it just makes me feel like I'm looking at another dead thing that's still going forward without changing.
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